Although I still refuse to admit that I fall in love with her, but seems like I'm accepting this fact. Everyday I go to school just trying to see her, even sometimes only saw her for a few second, I was still very happy. I'm so sick of this feeling. this is as same as the time in secondary school when I had this feeling on another person. But that person hurts me a lot, really a lot, and until now I don’t dare to go to another girl and tell her I love her, even though I see her everyday and think about her every night. Now, A’level is coming, and the stupid school always resist us from getting good results, when they suppose to help us. So now I’m in deep trouble.
Went to chalet with old friends, surprisingly she was there, but the way we treat each other, like not even a normal classmate, I admit that I pretend that I didn’t see her and never talk to her is because I felt very shy, but I didn’t know what her reason for ignoring me all the way. When we went to watch movie, and we were told that there were only couple seats, she immediately go to another guy and wanted to seat together with him. I knew she was just trying to avoid me. Maybe I am really a person that not socially desired and I should just go somewhere with nobody around me and stay until die.
I always claim that I like miss Laureen Toh, but obviously I am just trying to hide my true feeling. Whatever thing I do, I will just think about her every time. I was so sick, I think I already accept that I’m going to fail A’level, it’s just a problem of time, just wait for the time come and accept I failed and probably go to another country to start my new life.
I truly fall in love with 2 girls in Singapore, but my love is just to hurt myself more and more. I know we will never ever be together, but I just can’t control my feeling.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Blog resumed
TQ is back here.
ya, the reason for resuming the blog is really have things in the mind, but sometimes can't say out, so just use blog as a tool to share the opinions, whether it is bias or something, it is just my personal feelings.
today was good in the morning, learnt something from gp lecture, which is worth waking up early in the morning. but on my way to sengkang, i saw something i should see on the bus, when i passed by hougang mall. and suprisingly, i didnt feel angry or sad or even emo. maybe it is mecause i never let her know my feelings and really she does not hav eany relationship with me so i dont have the right to feel anything about it, but personally, i felt that i grew up already, because if this happens in my secondary school time, i may just jump out of the bus and punch that guy.
everyone is growing, and just to see who grow up faster, the people who grow up faster will always be successful in life. so let's grow up together.
Monday, January 11, 2010
Well, this is the beginning of the new year, 2010. I know this year is difficult for all of us A level students, but life is just like that, if we don't have this kind of pressure, we will have another one.
New class is very good, the classmates looks ok, i think after one week we will get to know each other well. Maybe, I can make new good friends, same as last year.
This year does not seems nice to me, got fever on the first day when I came back, lucky it was not H1N1. But now my body is still quite weak, quite long never do any physical training, well, in China, now it should be -21 degree, the temperature is not available for exercise. So I think during the PE lesson I need more time to adapt.
The teachers are ok, well someone may think that the math teacher is a bit not so good, but it's fine for me, her personility is perfectly fine for me, she is a very kind teacher, and i heard that her tutorial is not as bad as lecture. I believe that i can be used of her teacher style soon, and the most importantly, make math become my the strongest subject again, since this year we do not have chinese.
Ok, have to prepare for tomorrow's school, well, you know, tomorrow is a long day, so need to sleep early.
Bye
New class is very good, the classmates looks ok, i think after one week we will get to know each other well. Maybe, I can make new good friends, same as last year.
This year does not seems nice to me, got fever on the first day when I came back, lucky it was not H1N1. But now my body is still quite weak, quite long never do any physical training, well, in China, now it should be -21 degree, the temperature is not available for exercise. So I think during the PE lesson I need more time to adapt.
The teachers are ok, well someone may think that the math teacher is a bit not so good, but it's fine for me, her personility is perfectly fine for me, she is a very kind teacher, and i heard that her tutorial is not as bad as lecture. I believe that i can be used of her teacher style soon, and the most importantly, make math become my the strongest subject again, since this year we do not have chinese.
Ok, have to prepare for tomorrow's school, well, you know, tomorrow is a long day, so need to sleep early.
Bye
Monday, August 31, 2009
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